Happy New Year, I hope your Christmas season was filled with fun and warm memories.
I am so glad you are part of the Safe Haven community; a lot is planned for Safe Haven Center and excited to have you join us this new year!
We look forward to bringing you articles, webinars and seminars to help you grow as a person so you can love well in your marriage and family.
Thank you for your continued support and encouragement.
We are so grateful for each of you.
This is the second week in January. Are your Christmas decorations down and packed away? Are you back into your normal routine?
Wait!! Before you get back to work, kids, and your familiar routine,
I encourage you to take some time for reflection.
Climb to the top of your life ladder, rise above the clouds and busyness of your life, and take a look around.
Get a fresh perspective of where you have come, where you are and what lies ahead.
1. Look back and reflect on 2018. Review the year’s events and adventures. What brought joy and what was disappointing? As you look back on 2018, what are you most grateful for?
2. What is ahead for you in 2019? What season of life are you in? And your spouse, children or grandchildren? What projects and life events will you possibly face this next year?
3. To make the best of 2019, think of what may lie head, then plan ahead. What do you need to re-evaluate in your life? Maybe change? Or do differently? Add? (What hurts and resentments are best resolved now and not taken into 2019?)
What are your goals for 2019? What is God’s invitation to you for this next year?
4. What will nourish you and sustain you this next year?
If you are married, I recommend you doing the above exercise with your spouse.
It is easy to get busy as a couple. You each take care of your own responsibilities and make your own individual goals, not really coming together. This leads to parallel lives. And that is a dangerous way to live as a couple. I encourage you to review 2018 and plan for 2019 together.
Discover your core values, write a vision statement for ‘us’, and make goals that help you live out your values and vision for your life together.
Here is an exercise to help jump-start a conversation between you and your spouse:
1. What do we value? What is most important to us?
What is our vision for us as a couple? What is our vision for our family? What do we want to get out of this one precious life?
What is God’s vision and hope for us?
2. In light of our values and vision for life, what are our goals?
How will we live out our values and vision in practical ways this year? For example, if we value a close connected family, how will our daily schedule reflect that, allowing our family to spend meaningful time together?
I encourage each of you to truly understand what your spouse values and feels is most important in life. Care about the season of life your spouse is in, and the challenges that lie ahead for him/her in 2019.
Get to know what goals your spouse would like to make for this next year.
Let your spouse know you would like to be their greatest encourager as they strive toward their goals, living out what is most important to them. Tell your spouse you care, really care, about their dreams.
I hope that in return your spouse will care about yours, and together you can be each other’s greatest encourager.
We only get one life to live. And this is it. This is your life, here, now, today.
We can’t always change our circumstances, but we can choose who we want to be as we face them.
I pray your daily life will reflect what is most important to you.
Remember, all of us at Safe Haven Center are here as a resource for you.
If marriage is difficult, or you would like to take your marriage from good to great, consider coming to a Safe Haven Marriage Intensive.
I recommend a marriage intensive at least once, and optimally every 3 years. Your marriage is worth the effort and investment.